Category Archives: Education

Guns For Everyone

January 17, 2013 – 12:32 pm

Obsessed with twelve year-old Jodie Foster portrayal of the child prostitute John Hinkley saw TAXI DRIVER fifteen times in a row. He stalked the actress to Yale and wrote her many letters including this one from 1981. “Over the past seven months I’ve left you dozens of poems, letters and love messages in the faint […]

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Permanent Record

August 10, 2012 – 1:17 pm

My permanent record began with my name written in the birth certificate from Boston’s Lying-In Hospital. Vaccination dates were added in my childhood without my knowledge, however the nuns of Our Lady of the Foothills were fast to warn their students that any wrongdoings in the classroom were indelibly noted in our ‘permanent records’. I […]

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New York Hypocrites

June 8, 2012 – 4:21 pm

New York Hypocrites Easterners and liberals have fun exposing the Bible Belt’s rigidity of thought, but the School Committee of New York City has banned fifty words from tests to avoid upsetting any parents or children. The list; Abuse (physical, sexual, emotional, or psychological) Alcohol (beer and liquor), tobacco, or drugs Birthday celebrations (and birthdays) […]

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Tough Talking For Drunks

June 3, 2012 – 6:04 pm

THINGS THAT ARE HARD TO PRONOUNCE WHEN YOU’RE DRUNK: Indubitably; Innovative; Preliminary; Proliferation; Cinnamon THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU’RE DRUNK: Specificity; British Constitution; Passive-aggressive disorder; Loquacious; Transubstantiate

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Orgasms of Sneezes

March 6, 2012 – 8:02 pm

Der Speyer by FX Messerschmidt. Franz Xavier Messerschmidt stunned the Baroque Age with his sculptureS of contorted facial expressions. The artist lost favor with the Viennese court and he retreated to Swabian Alps to complete the 64 studies while studying necromancy under the influence of the pagan prophet Hermes Trismegistus. My Art 101 professor at […]

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