My best fart was at the Ritz club. Adam and the Ants were playing. The place was packed with pirate wankers. I had eaten something dodgy. Cheap Indian and had cut a level 15 in the men’s. The pissers scurried out and I went back into the audience to join my friends. The band hit the stage and went right into their one hit.
I felt another urge and warned them about the impending doom.
They told me to piss off
I said okay and let loose.
I hurried up to the balcony and stared down
There was a circle fifteen foot wide in the center of the audience.
My friends arrived several seconds later.
Gasping for a clear breath.
When Adam Ant finished the song, he commented on the fart.
My personal best ever.