Tonight the New Big Three of the Miami Heat will face elimination at the hands of the Old Big Three of the Boston Celtics in the Corporate Garden at North Station. The sell out crowd are expecting a victory from the Men in Green over the visitors. ESPN’s analysts have reassessed their previous judgment about the Celtics’ age to even admit that they were wrong in calling KG, Ray Allen, and The Truth old as well as having anointed LeBron James the coming of the Messiah without his ever having drained a clutch shot in the playoffs during his seven year career.

Bullshit.

LeBron James is the best player in the NBA. D-Wade has been to the promised land. Chris Bosh has been injured throughout the series, while the Celtics seem to get healthier. Tonight the left-handed forward has vowed to play more minutes to free up his teammates, but the true test of the match will be how the referees manage the game, so TV can sell more Taco Bells burritos and tickets to Adam Sandler’s fucked-up new movie THAT’S MY DAD or some bullshit like that.

The NBA over the last years has become more like the WWF in fixing games.

Last night during the Thunder-Spurs game the bald-headed ref changed the flow of the game with three calls.

I call him ‘the bald-headed motherfucker’ or BHM.

And last evening at Mullane’s across General Fowler’s Square from Frank’s Lounge I shouted out, “You bald-headed motherfucker.”

The bar went dead silent and every bald headed man in the place glared at me.

“What?”

“We all bald here.” A Knicks fan shouted from the end of the bar.

“But you’re not motherfuckers like that bald-headed fucker, are you?”

They all shook their heads, because they knew that I was right.

Not all of the time.

But at least 3% of the time.

ps Adam Sandler sucks.