Baseball season is in full swing. The Yankees and Mets are disappointing their fans and the Red Sox are going nowhere, but these teams’ mediocrity will not interfere with baseball’s greatest tradition of men never washing their hands after going to the toilets.
A 2008 survey conducted at the Atlanta Braves stadium revealed that while 95% of female Braves fans washed their hands while only 54% of their male counterpart completed their visit to the men’s room with a manual ablution.
A diehard Yankee fan told me that at the old Yankee Stadium less than 20% of men put their hands under a faucet after retreating from the urinal. 8000 men out of 40,000 Yankee fans. After hearing that information I always washed my hands at any sporting event, even if other men think it’s effeminate.
“I don’t piss on my hands.”
“I don’t want to touch the faucet, if someone’s touched it with their pee-covered hands.”
“I was in too much of a hurry to watch the game.”
These are only three of the excuses heard from Yankee fans and I’m sure that their reasons are no different from Red Sox supporters, but now I never shake anyone’s hands at a game and I certainly don’t make eye contact. Lastly I never touch anything in Yankee Stadium. There’s no telling who has touching it.
The same is not true in Pattaya’s go go bars.
On my last visit to Walking Street, I hired the one-armed bathroom attendant from the Carousel Go Go to keep count on the number of men who washed their hands and was surprised by her revelation that almost 50% of the men washed their hands, then again she was going for tips, which might jaundice free-style piss and wash statistics.
Me, I always wash my hands, just because I’m such a bad shot.
A caveat to travelers; not washing your hands after peeing is a crime in Singapore and the government has trained special agents to sniff your hands after exiting from the toilets, so wash your hands or else expect a caning.
Only 5 strokes for 1st offense.
What a bargain.
PS according to that capitalist rag THE WALL STREET JOURNAL all Yankee players must wash their hands after photo sessions in the dressing room.
Setting a good image for their fans.